Excerpt
from Weddings Valentine Style: Rich Inspiration for Every Woman's Dream Day
by Diann Valentine with Tonya Bolden
Once you have established your budget and your checklist, it's time
to make it real! If funds are in place, you can probably make your
dream come true with six months' lead time, possibly less (and possibly
more, depending on the complexity of your affair). Below, tips for the
planning. If you are not your own wedding planner, may this advice
empower you to keep your wedding planner on track and working in your
best interests.
Envision
Meditate on the style and overall tone and energy you want for your
day. High formality? Offbeat elegance? Casual chic?
Play Dress-up!
As you envision your day, dream on your attire -- the inspiration
for so much else.
People It
If you are going to have a bridal party, give your hoped-for
attendants plenty of advance notice, laying out your expectations of
them, so that they will have ample time and information to think it
over before they commit. And don't assume that just because you ask
they will -- or should -- say yes.
Next, the guest list. How large a guest list are you comfortable with? Two hundred? Fifty? Whatever your number, list all the couples and then all the singles, adding "+1" because no one wants to attend a wedding alone. (For heaven's sake, if you really want your single friends to come, allow them to bring a guest!) If you choose to include children in your celebration, make special plans for them. Have a separate child-friendly menu and special entertainment, possibly in another room. Make it so that the kids can be kids.
Location, Location, Location!
The Where often determines the When. The ballroom you have in mind
may be booked on your first-choice wedding date -- or perhaps it is
available but the church you desire is not. It's important to secure
your location as soon as possible to increase the likelihood of having
your celebration on your first- or second-choice day.
Yes, You Can but . . . May You?
Find out if any element of your wedding requires a permit. And
don't forget that marriage license! Most states no longer require a
blood test, and a license can usually be obtained in one to three days.
Keep in mind that some marriage licenses will expire if not filed within
thirty days. So be sure to read all the fine print.
Book Your Vendors
Contract with all the individuals and establishments you need to
make everything on your checklist happen, from caterer, florist, and DJ
to photographer and make-up artist. Do not dawdle. To secure top
talent, you may need to book the person six months or more in advance.
Remember, never, ever sacrifice quality for quantity. If necessary,
scale back the scope of your wedding to get the best professionals your
pocketbook will allow.
Organize It
Purchase a three-ring binder with indexable dividers, a pack (or
two) of three-hole paper, and a pack (or two) of sheet protectors.
Devote one section to each component of your wedding, from "Bridal
Attire," "Ceremony," "Reception," and "Stationery" on and on to "Et
Cetera, Et Cetera" and "Budget."
Use the lined paper in each section to log all communications, decisions, and transactions on items.
Use sheet protectors for the following:
- Clippings and photographs of elements you'd like incorporated in your gown (the neckline of one couture gown; the bell sleeves of another, for example), your wedding cake, the reception space, and other aspects of the celebration.
- Correspondence, estimates, invoices, and other vendor-related paperwork. Having a paper trail on everything is a must!
Budget Check
Every time you make a decision, reconcile your budget.
Make That Call to Attend!
The standard mail date for invitations is at least six weeks before
the wedding. For save-the-date cards, at least six months.
Make Your Gift Wish List
If you are comfortable having a gift registry, plan on giving it a
full day, as it is very time-consuming. Fortunately, many retailers now
offer scanners so you can easily select items for your registry.
However, you must still comb each department to personally select your
preferences. Also, most retailers offer a limited online registry. But
please do not insert gift registry instructions inside your wedding
invitations. I believe that your guests should still have the freedom
to buy you whatever they would like for your wedding. I always keep
wedding registry information on hand for my clients, and most guests
will call and ask. The only exception is when you are asking guests not
to bring a gift. And for heaven's sake, don't even think about asking
for monetary gifts . . . poor taste!